I am the ghost

[shadowhive]

So it seems to be time for another post that is mostly feels but also rambling.

First off rambling.

I’ve not posted much fic lately but that doesn’t mean I’m not writing! I’ve been working on stuff for the Kliego ship week which is in two weeks. I’ve never been a part of a ship week before so I hope this does well. I have ideas for all 7 days, with two fics started and one finished. One of the fics I’m working on is around 8K already and is longer than any fic I’ve done (and it’s not close to being finished yet). It’s also something I’m oddly proud of and invested in. I really hope people like it as much as I do because it’s (mostly) so far from what I usually do. But it’s really fun and I’m just trying to work out how how I’ll end it.

(The other wip needs some thought to, but has been sidetracked for that one which kinda took over my writing thoughts. Also, ironically, the first one completed is the one I worried most about doing)

Last week was my break from uni for Easter and I was supposed to spend the time reading. I did read some fics from my tabs of doom, but not as many as I hoped. I also failed at reading Queen’s Shadow. I had been super looking forward to it, but the writing bug meant I couldn’t focus. Hopefully I’ll read a chapter or so soon. A couple of the fics I’ve been reading lately have been winding down, but they’ve been so awesome. Things like Morgue have been such amazing reads.

I meant to do some gaming recently too but, like reading, that got sidetracked. I took advantage of the £1 game pass offer on Xbox so I hope to go on some of the games on there, especially Observer and Vampyr (as well as going on Prey without disc switching).

At least I watched some stuff. I watched Mamma Mia (my feel good film) plus Alien (For Alien day... although honestly I didn’t focus much on it). I did watch a film on Shudder at last yesterday but that wasn’t too special. The climax to it felt a bit rushed.

Yesterday I got gifted an amazing Klaus/Ray fic which is ngh. I can’t wait to read more. I might watch Queen Of The Damned soon because of it.

Lately though I’ve felt bursts of emo. It’s the same feeling I felt last week. It fades in and fades out over and over. I think it might be because of memories of last year. We had mum’s cancer scare and it was around this time when we got the all clear... and when I got a hurtful message from my ‘friend’ that abandoned me. I hate so much that my depression still feels the need to get hyperfocussed back on last year. I hate it. I hate how much it scarred me, how people I thought I could count on fucked me over and how my mind tries to remind me of that.

Ugh.

Anyway it’s mum’s birthday today but it feels... I dunno, like any other day. We’re not doing anything special. I’m just gonna make cake. I treated her to Endgame last week and we’re going somewhere to eat Saturday so...

Speaking of Saturday it’s free comic book day and Star Wars day. That means Resistance is being finished off on Disney Xd but I likely won’t see it all because I need to get to Birmingham. Ug. I hope to get some nice free comics and discounted Lego from the entertainer. And maybe Forbidden Planet phill have offers. Thankfully my money will be going in early so I can get stuff.

Other than that, this week I have my last regular uni assessment before May which is just the project write up and revision. Ugh.

Comments

[turps]

Kliego week sounds like an excellent thing, and way to go writing something so long. That's fantastic.

Happy belated birthday to your mum. Cake is always good on a birthday.

And for you a ♥ those pesky brain weasels need to leave you alone.

[shadowhive]

It is! Ivedone done a ship week so it should be fun! And thanks! I finished it today and it’s at 13.9K, the most words I’ve done for a single fic. I hope people like it, it’s been fun to write

Aww thank you! I’ll let her know! And yess cake

Thanks sweetie, they’re so annoupying