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Nov. 3rd, 2022 12:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shadowhiveFirst, thanks for all the nice comments on the last post, or was sweet
Halloween ended up being… well. I just wasn’t in the mood really.
I had intended to watch Trick R Treat as usual but I just, really wasn’t in the mindset. I did end up watching Ranboo’s spooky stream and later Eret’s (mostly due to their outfit). But yeah, my heart just wasn’t in it
(I fully intended to watch trick r treat over the last few days but that mood has persisted)
In fact the last few days I’ve just felt a mix of drained and hollowed out and just… exhausted. I just wanted to curl up and stay under blankets. Of course I couldn’t do that and I had to deal with people on both Tuesday and Wednesday which, ugh.
Tuesday food shop was meant to come and it did, but there had been substitutions that I knew I had to send back (mostly because the cost went up by about £20 at least). Some made sense, like the litter was changed to another type (albeit one three times the price, I sent one back, I would’ve sent both but mum was there as it came and just,.. ugh), one was ok (the cat food was switched to different flavours) and the bizarre. I’d put in a few reduced Halloween things (like Kipling cakes and such) and they sent… dog treats, overpriced mince pies and more dog treats. Like… who replaces pies with dog treats? It was just odd.
The rest of Tuesday didn’t have my focus all that much. I ended up going upstairs after the food shop and just laying in bed. (And later in the night there was a rare George stream)
It has felt though there has been an attempt by the universe to cheer me, in that Fall Guys have had Doctor Who bundles (I had enough showbucks for one, the fourth and fourteenth doctors) and Fortnite has a new Star Wars event and bundles (I’m working to get the Leia and Han bundle, which seems way better than the Luke one). And I have done a little cult of the lamb too, although it was annoying the game crashed mid run once.
Yesterday I had the opticians follow up and they seem to think everything is ok (I’m not sure, but then with all the stress it’s hard to tell) and they were able to tighten my glasses a bit because they’d been slipping. After that I went in the co-op and what did they have? The same things that got subbed out the shop and for the same price. Naturally I got some, though there was annoyance as my student card wouldn’t scan. (So I’ve had to get them to send a replacement but that was an ordeal). I also got a pumpkin from somewhere else which is good (i wanna use it for soup instead of carving).
When I got back I saw the pumpkin we had already got, which I’d meant to carve but hadn’t because of all the stress and tiredness…. And I realised it was already rotting. And if that isn’t the perfect metaphor for this Halloween I don’t know what is.
The rest of yesterday was watching Andor (good, but depressing), cult of the lamb (with the aforementioned crash) and then watching Ranboo’s birthday stream (though I lost focus part way through) and the start of Awesamdude’s subathon (which started with lore, which felt tricky to follow and seems to have set everything in a certain way which I suspect won’t be followed).
Today I’m just gonna rest a bit. I’m hoping to get in a writing mood but I don’t see that happening soon. I might game or watch something tonight but I dunno. It depends on my mood which has been… fluctuating between various depressive states.
Next week is the Set It Off gig, unless it gets postponed again (it seems this time it might actually happen). I’m hoping someone posts merch and they had that nice hoodie thing they had on the US tour. I’m hoping my excitement for them is sparked again by the video premiere tomorrow. (Though I’m kinda glad I didn’t get the violet when it was meant to be earlier in the year, I don’t feel the excitement for them is there enough for it). I’m also hoping the roadworks are finished because ugh, that was by the venue.
Admittedly I think something bad is going to happen either just before or just after it, because that’s how things have gone this past few months.
(And why did a Christmas card arrive today, it’s November 3rd)
Halloween ended up being… well. I just wasn’t in the mood really.
I had intended to watch Trick R Treat as usual but I just, really wasn’t in the mindset. I did end up watching Ranboo’s spooky stream and later Eret’s (mostly due to their outfit). But yeah, my heart just wasn’t in it
(I fully intended to watch trick r treat over the last few days but that mood has persisted)
In fact the last few days I’ve just felt a mix of drained and hollowed out and just… exhausted. I just wanted to curl up and stay under blankets. Of course I couldn’t do that and I had to deal with people on both Tuesday and Wednesday which, ugh.
Tuesday food shop was meant to come and it did, but there had been substitutions that I knew I had to send back (mostly because the cost went up by about £20 at least). Some made sense, like the litter was changed to another type (albeit one three times the price, I sent one back, I would’ve sent both but mum was there as it came and just,.. ugh), one was ok (the cat food was switched to different flavours) and the bizarre. I’d put in a few reduced Halloween things (like Kipling cakes and such) and they sent… dog treats, overpriced mince pies and more dog treats. Like… who replaces pies with dog treats? It was just odd.
The rest of Tuesday didn’t have my focus all that much. I ended up going upstairs after the food shop and just laying in bed. (And later in the night there was a rare George stream)
It has felt though there has been an attempt by the universe to cheer me, in that Fall Guys have had Doctor Who bundles (I had enough showbucks for one, the fourth and fourteenth doctors) and Fortnite has a new Star Wars event and bundles (I’m working to get the Leia and Han bundle, which seems way better than the Luke one). And I have done a little cult of the lamb too, although it was annoying the game crashed mid run once.
Yesterday I had the opticians follow up and they seem to think everything is ok (I’m not sure, but then with all the stress it’s hard to tell) and they were able to tighten my glasses a bit because they’d been slipping. After that I went in the co-op and what did they have? The same things that got subbed out the shop and for the same price. Naturally I got some, though there was annoyance as my student card wouldn’t scan. (So I’ve had to get them to send a replacement but that was an ordeal). I also got a pumpkin from somewhere else which is good (i wanna use it for soup instead of carving).
When I got back I saw the pumpkin we had already got, which I’d meant to carve but hadn’t because of all the stress and tiredness…. And I realised it was already rotting. And if that isn’t the perfect metaphor for this Halloween I don’t know what is.
The rest of yesterday was watching Andor (good, but depressing), cult of the lamb (with the aforementioned crash) and then watching Ranboo’s birthday stream (though I lost focus part way through) and the start of Awesamdude’s subathon (which started with lore, which felt tricky to follow and seems to have set everything in a certain way which I suspect won’t be followed).
Today I’m just gonna rest a bit. I’m hoping to get in a writing mood but I don’t see that happening soon. I might game or watch something tonight but I dunno. It depends on my mood which has been… fluctuating between various depressive states.
Next week is the Set It Off gig, unless it gets postponed again (it seems this time it might actually happen). I’m hoping someone posts merch and they had that nice hoodie thing they had on the US tour. I’m hoping my excitement for them is sparked again by the video premiere tomorrow. (Though I’m kinda glad I didn’t get the violet when it was meant to be earlier in the year, I don’t feel the excitement for them is there enough for it). I’m also hoping the roadworks are finished because ugh, that was by the venue.
Admittedly I think something bad is going to happen either just before or just after it, because that’s how things have gone this past few months.
(And why did a Christmas card arrive today, it’s November 3rd)
