Real pain for my sham friends
Jun. 16th, 2020 07:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shadowhiveSo last night went as I figured it would, only with a difference. I wasn’t gonna watch the Salisbury Poisonings on time, cause of the bone collector, but that was put back an hour so I could. The poisonings really is... well it’s scary. And you’ve got to admire the sheer balls on the BBC to still put on a thing that features a what it does right now.
After Bone Collector I put on Talons Of Weng-Chiang, which is the last episode of season 14. I’m not gonna do my thoughts on it just yet though, cause I went tired before the end. It’s a six parter though, so that’s understandable.
Today has been... well, it’s been an odd day.
To start with there was the food shop, a day late then it has been and an hour earlier. (And, as always, it was more than I expected.) Good points though, I got a Lego set in the sale, Olaf from Frozen and he’s cute (and spinny!) I also got the new Lego Star Wars magazine with an a-wing (which I didn’t know was out yet) and, shockingly, I finally got self raising flour! Yay! There were a few things not there. The cordial I like, the focaccia things that I’ve not seen in months. But ah well.
Of course that was tiring so when I came back I rested a bit. Mum’s tired too (and her hip’s aching as well as her head hurting, which might be due to the heat). So we only took Naryu a short walk. Plus, the weather has been dicey which hasn’t been good either.
There we’re a few announcements too. Firs there’s a Pokemon thing tomorrow at 2, supposedly 11 minutes and about the upcoming expansions and ‘something else’. There’s a full listing of the Lego mario sets. Some look better than others (I really like the piranha plant and the set with the shy guy) but the price is kinda... off putting. I will get some of the blind bags though, cause they look cute.
Lastly there’s been a glut of The Umbrella Academy content including screenshots and a synopsis. There’s good content here. Diego in a uniform! The series is dated to being in the 60s! And, most importantly, there’s shots of everyone together, thank fuck. I’m excited, and I want some Kliego Hairpulling fic stat.
Speaking of fic, I’m working on my fandomforoz some more now (or, well, before and after this post). It seems to be going well so I might get it done this week at last! Woo! Although the Pokemon expansion out tomorrow might distract from that.
So I’m gonna snuggle, watch tv and then finish Talons and watch the special features on the disc. Though there is a last part under a cut.
So it’s been a month since Cody and the others started to abandon the server and... it still all stings so much. I considered them to be my best friend and then got ditched. Not only that but they promised they’d explain what tipped them into going, which I hoped would lead to a conversation to change their mind but.... it just hasn’t materialised. I don’t think it will if I’m being honest. I hate how much it hurts.
Rationally I know that there’s no coming back. That the damage they’ve done is too much and no conversation could make it right but... still. I hate friendships being destroyed like that. I miss people even when they hurt me and want them back and I hate that. It that because of my depression or anxiety? Or some other mental illness? Or is that just who I am? I don’t know.
I hate it.
I’m not... I’m not overly sad not right now despite how that might sound. I’m just.... disappointed in them. In myself for hoping.
Anyway, I’m gonna go back to fic now.
After Bone Collector I put on Talons Of Weng-Chiang, which is the last episode of season 14. I’m not gonna do my thoughts on it just yet though, cause I went tired before the end. It’s a six parter though, so that’s understandable.
Today has been... well, it’s been an odd day.
To start with there was the food shop, a day late then it has been and an hour earlier. (And, as always, it was more than I expected.) Good points though, I got a Lego set in the sale, Olaf from Frozen and he’s cute (and spinny!) I also got the new Lego Star Wars magazine with an a-wing (which I didn’t know was out yet) and, shockingly, I finally got self raising flour! Yay! There were a few things not there. The cordial I like, the focaccia things that I’ve not seen in months. But ah well.
Of course that was tiring so when I came back I rested a bit. Mum’s tired too (and her hip’s aching as well as her head hurting, which might be due to the heat). So we only took Naryu a short walk. Plus, the weather has been dicey which hasn’t been good either.
There we’re a few announcements too. Firs there’s a Pokemon thing tomorrow at 2, supposedly 11 minutes and about the upcoming expansions and ‘something else’. There’s a full listing of the Lego mario sets. Some look better than others (I really like the piranha plant and the set with the shy guy) but the price is kinda... off putting. I will get some of the blind bags though, cause they look cute.
Lastly there’s been a glut of The Umbrella Academy content including screenshots and a synopsis. There’s good content here. Diego in a uniform! The series is dated to being in the 60s! And, most importantly, there’s shots of everyone together, thank fuck. I’m excited, and I want some Kliego Hairpulling fic stat.
Speaking of fic, I’m working on my fandomforoz some more now (or, well, before and after this post). It seems to be going well so I might get it done this week at last! Woo! Although the Pokemon expansion out tomorrow might distract from that.
So I’m gonna snuggle, watch tv and then finish Talons and watch the special features on the disc. Though there is a last part under a cut.
So it’s been a month since Cody and the others started to abandon the server and... it still all stings so much. I considered them to be my best friend and then got ditched. Not only that but they promised they’d explain what tipped them into going, which I hoped would lead to a conversation to change their mind but.... it just hasn’t materialised. I don’t think it will if I’m being honest. I hate how much it hurts.
Rationally I know that there’s no coming back. That the damage they’ve done is too much and no conversation could make it right but... still. I hate friendships being destroyed like that. I miss people even when they hurt me and want them back and I hate that. It that because of my depression or anxiety? Or some other mental illness? Or is that just who I am? I don’t know.
I hate it.
I’m not... I’m not overly sad not right now despite how that might sound. I’m just.... disappointed in them. In myself for hoping.
Anyway, I’m gonna go back to fic now.
no subject
Date: 2020-06-16 09:07 pm (UTC)On the missing people thing, it may just be down to the type of person that you are; there's nothing wrong with that. It's okay to miss what you had, and who you had, even at the same time as knowing that you can't go back. I think you can grieve for relationships you lose, even if it's because the other person left, and it hurting and wanting the person back is part of that process.
no subject
Date: 2020-06-16 09:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-06-16 09:12 pm (UTC)Yeah you’re right I just... I wish I was better at it you know? I had that my brain can hyperfocussed on things and just..l blah 🥺
no subject
Date: 2020-06-16 09:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-06-19 05:00 pm (UTC)I watched all the Salisbury Poisonings and I have to agree it is scary. It was like something from a disaster fic, and yet it was reality.
I have your fic tabbed, hopefully I'll read it soon.
♥
no subject
Date: 2020-06-19 05:47 pm (UTC)Yeah it really was! I’m glad I wasn’t near there because it seems so scary
Aww thank you, I hope you like